When I was a kid my Grandma had a case of small journals that belonged to her grandma. I loved to read them. Mostly there was nothing very exciting or astounding, just everyday happenings. She would write that she went to the grocery store and then would list how much each thing cost. Or she would write about taking care of her baby, my grandma's mother, not how she felt about taking care of the baby just about taking care of the baby. Yet I found it all absolutely fascinating.
I don't write in a journal usually, I should but I never seem to do it. I love writing and putting my thoughts into words but with a journal they tend to sit in my nightstand and generally when I finally get to bed, I crash and am asleep quickly. So I blog and whether anyone else reads it or not I put many of my thoughts and feelings in writing. I probably should journal my more private thoughts and such sometimes too but maybe that's a goal for another year.
I sit here on my iPhone (Can I say once again, Thank you Steve Jobs for iPhones!) at close to midnight listening to my baby babble completely not ready to fall asleep, and I write, about nothing.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Parenting
Being a parent is incredible. It is incredibly difficult, incredibly rewarding, incredibly fun, and also incredibly exhausting (especially the older you get). Much of the difficult moments have nothing to do with your kids exactly; that is to say it isn't necessarily directly related to something they have done or not done. Much of it comes down to our expectations of ourselves as parents and guilt we often feel for not doing it all "the right way".
For example I go to bed each night feeling like I could've done better or here or done something differently there. Truth is I'm a pretty good parent, not perfect, but good. I love my kids, a lot, I feed them, I try to make sure they are clean and have all the other basic necessities of life. On top of that I try to make sure they have fun, that we have fun with them, and that they learn what they need to so that when the time comes and they move out they can clean and cook, and basically take care of themselves.
And yet, I still feel guilt. "I shouldn't have told Lilli to 'Hold on' so many times today."
"I should've spent more time talking to Emma instead of rushing when saying goodnight so I could finish cleaning the kitchen."
"I should've spent more time with Oscar helping him practice the song for his audition."
"I should've put down my work and watched the movie with Henry when he asked me to."
Obviously not earth-shattering but there is guilt, and there is room to improve.
I just read a post on another blog. I loved a lot of what she had to say. You can read the whole post here, but she was talking about how parenting is difficult and we aren't going to love every moment but there will be many moments that we love. I love that and wholeheartedly agree. The one thing I didn't agree with was when she said she was annoyed by being told to enjoy it because it all goes too fast. She said she doesn't really get annoyed by the people but the idea. I get both sides though. I know it goes by so fast, I know where these old ladies are coming from. Now that some of my kids are teenagers, I do miss those days when they were all little . I miss their antics, and the playgroups, and days at the park. I still have my younger kids but I miss the early days of parenting. I wouldn't trade it for where we are now but I wish I knew then how much I would come to cherish it all. But that is the thing about reminiscing, you get to remember the good things and let the bad fall to the wayside. That is the beauty of parenting. It is hard and sometimes thankless. It involves late nights, early mornings, and hours of work in between. In the end, however, it is worth it and you are happy to have been through the journey.
So you don't have to feel like you are doing something wrong if you don't "enjoy" every moment but take comfort in the fact that someday you will miss these days and look back on it all with fondness and tenderness. And someday you can tell someone how you loved these days too, but maybe let them know that it wasn't always easy, just very very worth it.
For example I go to bed each night feeling like I could've done better or here or done something differently there. Truth is I'm a pretty good parent, not perfect, but good. I love my kids, a lot, I feed them, I try to make sure they are clean and have all the other basic necessities of life. On top of that I try to make sure they have fun, that we have fun with them, and that they learn what they need to so that when the time comes and they move out they can clean and cook, and basically take care of themselves.
And yet, I still feel guilt. "I shouldn't have told Lilli to 'Hold on' so many times today."
"I should've spent more time talking to Emma instead of rushing when saying goodnight so I could finish cleaning the kitchen."
"I should've spent more time with Oscar helping him practice the song for his audition."
"I should've put down my work and watched the movie with Henry when he asked me to."
Obviously not earth-shattering but there is guilt, and there is room to improve.
I just read a post on another blog. I loved a lot of what she had to say. You can read the whole post here, but she was talking about how parenting is difficult and we aren't going to love every moment but there will be many moments that we love. I love that and wholeheartedly agree. The one thing I didn't agree with was when she said she was annoyed by being told to enjoy it because it all goes too fast. She said she doesn't really get annoyed by the people but the idea. I get both sides though. I know it goes by so fast, I know where these old ladies are coming from. Now that some of my kids are teenagers, I do miss those days when they were all little . I miss their antics, and the playgroups, and days at the park. I still have my younger kids but I miss the early days of parenting. I wouldn't trade it for where we are now but I wish I knew then how much I would come to cherish it all. But that is the thing about reminiscing, you get to remember the good things and let the bad fall to the wayside. That is the beauty of parenting. It is hard and sometimes thankless. It involves late nights, early mornings, and hours of work in between. In the end, however, it is worth it and you are happy to have been through the journey.
So you don't have to feel like you are doing something wrong if you don't "enjoy" every moment but take comfort in the fact that someday you will miss these days and look back on it all with fondness and tenderness. And someday you can tell someone how you loved these days too, but maybe let them know that it wasn't always easy, just very very worth it.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Yesterday
Well it has happened to me once again. Yesterday I wrote an awesome post, waxing poetic and thoughtful. Sadly, or fortunately, it is gone. Maybe it was a little too deep or maybe it was just too late at night and didn't make sense anyhow. No matter because it is gone, lost forever.
Instead I will write about Christmas and my latest project.
Christmas was fun, albeit crazy and hectic. My sister came in from Alabama with her family. With her having 7 kids it was a week of non-stop sleepovers and visiting. It was a lot of fun and we were so sad to see them go.
My kids really wanted to do the 12 days of Christmas again this year but I hadn't planned for it so we did the 7 days of Christmas. It was still fun and the kids seemed happy with their gifts. That always makes for a good Christmas.
Lars got me the food processor I've been eyeing. Sounds like a lame present, I know, but for me it is perfect. There is nothing I love to receive more than kitchen gear and gadgets! I've used it a ton already and just love it so much! We were so grateful to be in our new home for Christmas, though we all wished we were at Disneyland, we just were happy to be in our own home.
On to my project. I have made a goal to cook dinner every night for my family. Not to say I didn't cook a lot before but there were cereal or sandwich nights and way too many eating out nights. It seemed that if we for some reason had a late or busy evening we would eat out because it was getting late. So what changed is that I want to cook the meals at home, saving us money and giving us more nutritious meals. So if we make dinner at 7pm then that is when we make dinner. It actually has been pretty easy and so far delicious. The point is, when I decided to do this I wanted some more dinner recipes to work with. Now, I could easily go on the Internet and find endless recipes, I do that a lot. This time I wanted to try to gather recipes of friends. Tried and true meals that having been used by people I know and trust have good taste ;)
So far I have about 15 great recipes and am hoping to add more. Can't wait to compile them and start trying them out.
Instead I will write about Christmas and my latest project.
Christmas was fun, albeit crazy and hectic. My sister came in from Alabama with her family. With her having 7 kids it was a week of non-stop sleepovers and visiting. It was a lot of fun and we were so sad to see them go.
My kids really wanted to do the 12 days of Christmas again this year but I hadn't planned for it so we did the 7 days of Christmas. It was still fun and the kids seemed happy with their gifts. That always makes for a good Christmas.
Lars got me the food processor I've been eyeing. Sounds like a lame present, I know, but for me it is perfect. There is nothing I love to receive more than kitchen gear and gadgets! I've used it a ton already and just love it so much! We were so grateful to be in our new home for Christmas, though we all wished we were at Disneyland, we just were happy to be in our own home.
On to my project. I have made a goal to cook dinner every night for my family. Not to say I didn't cook a lot before but there were cereal or sandwich nights and way too many eating out nights. It seemed that if we for some reason had a late or busy evening we would eat out because it was getting late. So what changed is that I want to cook the meals at home, saving us money and giving us more nutritious meals. So if we make dinner at 7pm then that is when we make dinner. It actually has been pretty easy and so far delicious. The point is, when I decided to do this I wanted some more dinner recipes to work with. Now, I could easily go on the Internet and find endless recipes, I do that a lot. This time I wanted to try to gather recipes of friends. Tried and true meals that having been used by people I know and trust have good taste ;)
So far I have about 15 great recipes and am hoping to add more. Can't wait to compile them and start trying them out.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
5-6-7...months that is
Yes, this is one of those all about my baby posts. He is adorable and I have to brag sometimes.
Can you believe my "bathtub" baby is 7 months. Seems like yesterday I was waiting, waiting, waiting to have him. I seriously thought I was going to have an elephant pregnancy, I think they last 2 years. Yikes!
Sam is crawling, pulling up on furniture, smiling, laughing, and basically wrapping everyone around his little finger. He does love to party at 1 in the morning sometimes but that's what it's all about. Thank goodness it isn't all about the Hokey Pokey.
That's really it for today. I suppose I should do my after Christmas post next. Stay tuned.
 |
| 6 month stats: 19 pounds 29 inches Cute as can be |
Can you believe my "bathtub" baby is 7 months. Seems like yesterday I was waiting, waiting, waiting to have him. I seriously thought I was going to have an elephant pregnancy, I think they last 2 years. Yikes!
Sam is crawling, pulling up on furniture, smiling, laughing, and basically wrapping everyone around his little finger. He does love to party at 1 in the morning sometimes but that's what it's all about. Thank goodness it isn't all about the Hokey Pokey.
That's really it for today. I suppose I should do my after Christmas post next. Stay tuned.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Deer in the headlights
So, our new house is up in the hills a bit. What that means is that we have deer, a lot of deer, in the neighborhood.
It is so fun to walk to my car and see 3 or 4 down at the end of the road walking across the street early in the morning, or meandering in a nearby field. One night Lars and Henry were going to the store and saw one in the yard. The other kids and I looked out every window but we never did see it. You think deer and your mind conjures up images of peaceful forests, babbling brooks, and serene morning breezes.
But I have a confession. I am just as afraid of having a run in with a deer at night as I am of having a run in with, say...a mugger. When I go to my car late at night I am on high alert. I warily walk to the car listening, watching, ready to run or jump into the car should a mugger or, more realistically here in our small city in Utah, a deer should appear. I'm convinced if I catch one unaware that it will stomple me to death. (Yup, pretty sure that's a word)
So there you have it. Animal loving, wanna-be back woodsman, Crystal Andersen, is a little afraid of deer. (Though I also really wanna pet one!) :)
It is so fun to walk to my car and see 3 or 4 down at the end of the road walking across the street early in the morning, or meandering in a nearby field. One night Lars and Henry were going to the store and saw one in the yard. The other kids and I looked out every window but we never did see it. You think deer and your mind conjures up images of peaceful forests, babbling brooks, and serene morning breezes.
But I have a confession. I am just as afraid of having a run in with a deer at night as I am of having a run in with, say...a mugger. When I go to my car late at night I am on high alert. I warily walk to the car listening, watching, ready to run or jump into the car should a mugger or, more realistically here in our small city in Utah, a deer should appear. I'm convinced if I catch one unaware that it will stomple me to death. (Yup, pretty sure that's a word)
So there you have it. Animal loving, wanna-be back woodsman, Crystal Andersen, is a little afraid of deer. (Though I also really wanna pet one!) :)
Monday, January 2, 2012
Shower
No we aren't talking about the fun parties when people get married or have a baby. We are talking about a real shower. Not that I know much about them, when I do see the shower it is about a one minute affair. Get in soap up, wash hair, hop out.
When you have a baby that wakes up at night to nurse you end up having to make a choice. Shower or sleep a little longer. The choice is simple...sleep.
Ok so it's not like I go around
un-showered for days at a time but I often have missed days for sure. It only feels like I walk around un-showered for days at a time.
Still a shower, or if I go really wild...a bath, feels like a luxury and is a treasured thing as a mom.
Don't take them for granted.
When you have a baby that wakes up at night to nurse you end up having to make a choice. Shower or sleep a little longer. The choice is simple...sleep.
Ok so it's not like I go around
un-showered for days at a time but I often have missed days for sure. It only feels like I walk around un-showered for days at a time.
Still a shower, or if I go really wild...a bath, feels like a luxury and is a treasured thing as a mom.
Don't take them for granted.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
2012
It is amazing to me. Another year gone. Before I know it Sam will be 1. He is already over half a year old, hitting the ripe old age of 7 months just after Christmas.
I have a few goals this year.
Have more fun with my kids and don't sweat the small stuff.
Write on my blog everyday for a year starting with today.
Go to Disneyland :)
I have a couple more personal goals but these are a few of my main goals and hopes for this year.
So before we fully move into the new year a brief recap of 2011....
I got really huge (pregnancy)
Henry entered double digits (10)
Lilli turned 5
Sadly, an old friend passed away "before his time"
I had Sam, alone...in a bathtub
Went to San Francisco for the 1st time
Moved out of our beautiful home we ha worked so hard to restore.
We lived with family for 3 long months and learned patience and gratitude.
We finally moved into our new home!
Our renters decided they didn't like the amount of rent anymore so we "agreed" they would move out.
I stressed that our kids wouldn't have Christmas ;)
The great windstorm of 2011 and the miracle of the pine tree that fell and didn't damage anything.
Christmas with ALL my siblings.
The loss of another wonderful friend all too soon.
New years!
And here we are.
It has been an exciting year, full of happiness, sadness, strength, loss, newness, bonding, and adventures.
I can't wait to see what this year has in store and I hope to do all I can to make it a wonderful year for myself and my loved ones. (And I really hope it includes Disneyland!!!)
I have a few goals this year.
Have more fun with my kids and don't sweat the small stuff.
Write on my blog everyday for a year starting with today.
Go to Disneyland :)
I have a couple more personal goals but these are a few of my main goals and hopes for this year.
So before we fully move into the new year a brief recap of 2011....
I got really huge (pregnancy)
Henry entered double digits (10)
Lilli turned 5
Sadly, an old friend passed away "before his time"
I had Sam, alone...in a bathtub
Went to San Francisco for the 1st time
Moved out of our beautiful home we ha worked so hard to restore.
We lived with family for 3 long months and learned patience and gratitude.
We finally moved into our new home!
Our renters decided they didn't like the amount of rent anymore so we "agreed" they would move out.
I stressed that our kids wouldn't have Christmas ;)
The great windstorm of 2011 and the miracle of the pine tree that fell and didn't damage anything.
Christmas with ALL my siblings.
The loss of another wonderful friend all too soon.
New years!
And here we are.
It has been an exciting year, full of happiness, sadness, strength, loss, newness, bonding, and adventures.
I can't wait to see what this year has in store and I hope to do all I can to make it a wonderful year for myself and my loved ones. (And I really hope it includes Disneyland!!!)
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